Who's the Yahoo now?

In what seems to be an aptly named company, as a part of Verizon's acquisition yesterday, YAHOO is preparing to offer Marissa Mayer a $57 million severance package for a four year failed tenure. And yes, this is on top of her compensation which totaled over $162 million.
Me? I got me a music degree! Yep, that's right. I negotiated a compensation package that included a salary equivalent to Mayer's clothing allowance, an uncovered parking space, unlimited weekend use of a not-so charter bus, and no paid vacation! Talk about the Art of the Deal... Nailed it!


Hey YAHOO, I will be your new CEO and I will do it on the cheap! Business experience is required? No problem!


Years ago, as an act of self indulgence and professional punishment, I analyzed my music program as if it were a business and the results were almost alarming. Treating my students as paid employees and the rehearsal/performance schedule as our work week, I created a spreadsheet that showed my program for what it was, a business!


 
New business cards were ordered with the title CEO under my name! Why not? My business had 203 employees and annual payroll liabilities in excess of $1.7 million! This didn't even include any costs associated with facilities, benefits, equipment, technology, or transportation. After consulting with my local chamber of commerce, I discovered that my 170 piece marching band would have been a top three employer in my city, with me as the CEO! Business classes, you ask? I didn't take any. In fact, I barely survived 20th century harmony (an oxymoron if there ever was one).


Yes, you run a business! Granted, the pay and perks may not quite measure up to other CEO's, but the ROI (return on investment) is off the charts!


So who's the YAHOO now?

Previous
Previous

Is my 401-OK?

Next
Next

Happy New Year!